Old Blacksmith posts..

THURSDAY, 15 MARCH 2012

New Reference Material


Our science and culture editor writes:

A living language is constantly changing

The latest amendments to the Oxford University Press Reference and Citation  Online Database are due for publication in May 2012.  The database,  which lists both standard dictionary changes and incorporations and works of specialist definition and explanation under the OUP imprint (science dictionary, legal dictionary, short encyclopaedia  etc.) is updated every two years and the 2012 edition has reached the letter M. Some of the new entries which may be of interest to Bureau readers are listed below.

McCann Measure, noun, [Scientific] This is a new variable fractal metric used particularly in measurement of the seashore and it varies between zero and infinity.  Maximal: It was nine  hundred thousand MM metres  from one end of  Brighton beach to the other.Minimal: it was twenty MM yards from the restaurant to the apartment . The quantum correspondence unit is the BOG, derived from  Bottom of Garden (source unknown).


McCann-Oldfield  Safety Check [legal/medical] A specialised check on the condition of an old or  vulnerable person which consists of looking at walls, doors, shutters etc. but excludes observation of the person at risk. The M.O.S.C is sometimes known vulgarly in  care homes as  a “Death Watch” or a “Stocking-Filler”.

Macvirus, noun [medical] A virus which strikes suddenly at family members after their homes have been searched by the police. Symptoms are sore throats and extreme verbal inaccuracy. Unlike sufferers from similar viruses, patients do not lie down but lie up, down, sideways and continually. An attack lasts only as long as it is needed.

McCann Truth Value, MTV [philosophical ] This is a measure of truth and paradox, value varying between zero and one. MTV 1 statements always mean their own opposite. Example; we are glad to co-operate with the police means we are actively destroying their work. We were pleased to be told that we were not suspects means those  bastards are taking us in next week. Related is the TTV, derived from Tapas Group Truth Value, used in the specialised sense of an intention which will deliberately never be carried out. Example: We will be glad to return to Portugal if we can be of any help.

McCann’s Best Friend [linguistic; humorous] Not a dog.

McCann-Healy Psychosis [medical] A special form of schizophrenic psychosis. The patient gives the impression of normality and even sweetness  to outsiders but is prone to episodes of extreme violence. Sufferers sometimes have the verbal version only, in which they express manic hate for their enemies in personal writings such as diaries or memoirs. In more serious cases, which are usually covered up by loyal family members, the victim punches walls and attacks furniture etc. In the episodic acute phase of a severe condition the victim should never be approached without precautions, particularly by the  young.

Where the disease has developed to the upper level patients are plagued by visions of which they are at first ashamed but, as the disease progresses, inappropriately  begin to find quite normal, such as, for example, giant vivid pictures of children’s genitals being ravished. Despite their apparently normal conduct people suffering this condition desperately need treatment – and soon.

McSwear Disease, A mild form of Tourette’s Syndrome which is sometimes a diagnostic indicator of the potential onset of McCann-Healy Psychosis.Sufferers defy and attempt to block out reality with foul language. Sometimes known as FTS, or [vulgar] Fucking-Tosser Syndrome.  .

McCann Time Dilation/Contraction  Measure [scientific] A branch of relativity theory measuring events which are timed differently according to the location of the observer. Take a twin observer event.  Observer 1 says the event took thirty seconds and the event was static; Observer 2 says the event took three minutes and involved forward movement. In humorous scientific terms Observer 1 is often called  the bathroom girl  or  “bint in a towel” observer [origin unknown]. Observer 2 is often known as the “tit twister [again origin unknown].



MTI sufferer at onset of injury…

McCann Tendon Injury [medical] A disabling  injury to the Achilles tendon, often caused by sports activity such as badminton or, particularly, tennis. The MTI is unique in fully healing within fifteen minutes.



…and another,  fifteen minutes after onset

Macfly  verb[criminology] The action of detailed planning for an illegal flight from a country by   car because one expects to be convicted  on serious criminal charges.

Healy-deal, or healydealy. [commercial] A deal which never existed but which was invented by one of the two parties.

Macfun, noun [entertainment] The action of having fun from a macfunned. Normally a macfunned is set up with the best of intentions in favour of a person in need. That person receives zero benefits from the fund. The people who set it up and run it, however, have macfun, that is long-distance  air flights, professional fees and mortgage benefits etc. Some people believe that a funfund of this type is both immoral and illegal. In its worst form it is said to be a transparent macfunned.

Bigmac, noun, [financial and entertainment]  A beneficiary of a macfunned.

Littlemac [tragic] A theoretical beneficiary of a macfunned who actually receives nothing whatever of the funfunds.

Macspenses [financial and entertainment] These are “expenses” in a macfunned that the public are never allowed to see; they run into the millions of pounds.

Macperks These are macspences such as family flight tickets etc.

Macdoze minor [medical] An extremely rare form of  African trypanosomiasis  or sleeping sickness. Victims are under three years of age and fall spontaneously into deep sleep from which they cannot be awakened for at least six hours, however loud the noises around them. Only two European cases have ever been known but, since the doctor involved took the extraordinary decision not to refer the cases to the  emergency services, our knowledge of the condition in Europe remains poor.

Mactannervision [medical] MTV A form of image intensification or night vision usually associated with cats’ eyes. In a few cases it is found in humans and the person will possess detailed night vision while remaining invisible to others. This is sometimes knows as having mac’s eyes.

Macwatch, noun. (1) A form of guarding or supervision inviting trespass, kidnap and sometimes death. Example: Who let the fucking suicide bomber in, for Christ’s sake? Wasn’t there a sentry? No sergeant, that night there was only a macwatch. (2) A wristwatch  which always reads 9.04 PM and is invisible to others. The typical wearer suddenly “sees” it after a period of months.

Macmemory syndrome [medical] Sudden and astonishing  retrieval of sensations from memory many months after the event. It is associated with Geripys disease, a mental condition  in which sufferers remember “sensing” strangers or “abductors” hiding in the lavatory bowl while urinating. V. rare

Mactar, or Tarmac An expression of thanks uttered by criminals  when the Macfunned gives them vast amounts of money donated by a foolishly sentimental and gullible public to help a missing child.

Macsagonna [criminology] Slang term used by Glasgow criminals. Example: Macsagonna. When? This year. So’s his wife.

Now that was a much needed laugh Tigger. Brilliant but he forgot the Macswoosh.
The amazing ability of curtains to disengage themselves from behind beds and chairs with no apparent assistance from open windows, then tuck themselves back in place.

Or the Macbag. A new type of sports bag which has the ability to appear in photographs then completely disappear into thin air. Similar to the Macblanket in nature.

I only have a few more and so I've put them in a separate topic to avoid confusion. i hope the Bureau has kept their old posts!

i will try to get the pictures in somehow..


This is my favourite:   McCann’s Best Friend [linguistic; humorous] Not a dog.

Brilliant, Mactanner vision lol!

I used to like all these pictures on the old 3As of the McCanno sets, and the wonderful things you could build from them.

Yum! Any more of these?

Tigger wrote:Yum! Any more of these?

We aim to please.

There's a whole thread of them on MCF under Reference. They were created by Buildafire, who also made up some wonderful Scottish Country Dancing sets, involving the various manoeuvres of the Tapas 7. I can't find it now, unfortunately; it was very clever and funny.

Its certainly a shame that 'Blacksmith' found it necessary to delete all his older posts from his blog earlier in the year when he had his 'epiphany'.
Lucky some of us saved a few so any newcomers can be educated.There is certainly some irony in his latest attack on forum dwellers who believe in a possible whitewash.

I can see why so many refugees on here support him reading through his attacks on Tony Bennett and Jill's forum.Some will have missed similiar attacks on Amaral.

That said those who know me will also know my views on blacksmith so we should probably stick to his posts on the case and what ,if any,insider knowledge he may have.

Mind you i have always found his wonderfully bilious attacks on mitchell quite funny.

When i get a bit more time i'll post some up.

Sorry i went slightly off topic there.

I believe 'Blacksmith' started commenting on the case through the 'Cracked Mirror' around Oct 2009.So if you wanted to look for his earliest comments on the case thats where you may find them.
That date strangely coincides with the closure of the 3 A's forum by the way which is why some of us believe that is where he 'cut his teeth' originally.

This one is quite interesting from Jan 2013 where he claims the mccanns are about to settle on Amarals terms...


Thursday, 17 January 2013
Libel diary–Thursday morning January 17

John Blacksmith writes: I've experienced plenty of shocking events in my time and survived encounters with a number of monsters but I'm willing to confess that I read Kate McCann's Madeleine with something approaching horror.

The stormy and unpredictable violence of her personality, her inability to conceive of anyone's needs beyond her own, her failure ever to write about, or confront the memory of, her oldest child as a real human being, confining herself instead to recalling and describing photographs and images of her daughter in a pattern of clinical aberration, were troubling enough. Then there was the extraordinary risk she was taking in setting out a version of events that people close to her, particularly her Portuguese lawyer and his assistant, knew to be untrue. What, I wondered, was she thinking as she sat alone at her desktop, somehow constructing a narrative on several different levels at once, addressing simultaneously the police who she knew would be reading her book, her seven friends and her family who had seen a very different Kate McCann, the journalists who she had used to subvert the investigation so successfully and, finally, the "public" itself? Perhaps she'd convinced herself that the latter, whose support in the UK had carried her through so many dangerous passages, was the only one that mattered and would continue to keep her impregnable and wrote accordingly. Even creepier was the sense that one gets from certain Nabokov books, including Lolita – the feeling that at times you can hear a ghostly voice hidden somewhere behind the narrative, laughing at the challenge of deceiving the audience.

For the book reveals that Kate McCann is quite mad. That was why I softened the end of the review I wrote for the McCann Files: the exposure of her madness was so raw and discomfiting that it made me pause at the impact my own writings might have on what passes publicly for her personality if she read them.

Sympathy for a sick person might be in order then. Except.

Except for her ruthlessness in her own interests illustrated by the psychotic pursuit of Goncalo Amaral in which she used everything she had, the wealth her public fans had provided, the support and sympathy of people who believed in her, the dirty newspapers like the Mirror willing to collude in the plot and the unrelenting viciousness at her core, to destroy him. "Destroy", for once, means what it says. As does "Kafkaesque". The assault that she and her tight-mouthed accomplice sprang on Amaral, the nightmare in which they trapped him and the relentless way they upped the pursuit month by month could easily have driven a lesser man to suicide.

While Kate McCann was whining to the UK media at the unfair fate she had suffered, I was hearing how her campaign had claimed its first victim – Amaral's wife having a complete breakdown and telling her beleaguered husband that even if he was right she simply couldn't stand the terror of it any more: both the pain and the odds against them were too great, he had to seek out the McCanns and settle. She was an innocent victim in the way the whiner never was but that cut no ice with Kate McCann: she was just an object to be trodden on and squashed in her pursuit of her enemy.

That pursuit has failed. The McCanns are going to settle on Amaral's terms and that means it's the beginning of the end of six years of lies and deception. No, I can't evoke even a touch of sympathy for them: they have acted wickedly and now they are going to pay.

------------------
Well the wheels of justice do seem to roll very slowly in this case so he may well be proved right i suppose.
I hope so anyway.

Don't want to spoil the thread as i think its interesting to many so just for the avoidance of doubt here is another old one (one of several along the same lines) which was Blacksmiths reaction to the Mcalpine debacle.
Clearly Blacksmith had some kind of soft spot for Mcalpine but was infact correct on this occasion,at least in legal terms as far as we know anyway.

I post it because in it he confirms that he does 'walk amongst us'.Or at least did at that time.


Thursday, 15 November 2012
Blah blah




Due to mass hysteria

John Blacksmith writes:

Let me repeat. I’ve never written for McCann forum members: the aim of the blog has always been to provide factual information for newcomers to the case and journalists wishing to improve their knowledge of the McCanns—they are the target audience.

I used to post on them and I’ve certainly skimmed the forums on a regular basis to get a feel for what they’re thinking, noting en passant that the sort of talented community that existed in the 3As forum has dwindled away until only a hard core remains.

That hard core, which prides itself on being made up of independent thinkers, has, for whatever reasons, got hung up on a startlingly childish view of the world in which they consider it hard-bitten and realistic to come out with comments that “it’s all a racket” and that there are hidden hands controlling the UK and protecting the McCanns. The prime suspects have gone from the politicians to the newspaper owners to the Masons and downwards until now it is High Up Paedos.

Lord McAlpine is a decent, warm and funny man, a good servant of his country and someone who is not at all well. Quite how an internet movement which began by investigating the lies of Kate & Gerry McCann has become a sex and crime obsessed clique of self-righteous losers that thinks it’s acceptable to defame honourable men like McAlpine defeats me. What a truly wicked thing to do!

Thanks  for those posts!  
Yes, the idea is that there are several Blacksmiths, certainly there were a few curious posts about Lord McAlpine.

It is a pity they withdrew from supporting Dr. Amaral who may or may not have been badly advised. At least he was bright enough to decline a visit to the UK courtesy of the Madeleine Foundation (which reminds me of the recent topic on the Daily Mail finally  picking up on TB's brilliant 'Madeleine's Law' ) 

Roll on February!

It's good to see these older ones, most of which I apparently missed at the time.

Yes, another thing that he got 100% right was that the McCanns would try and settle with Amaral out of court, and that he would refuse. This looked like madness at the time, but it turned out to be true. I do think that the Bureau has some limited "inside" knowledge, but with several different people writing for it, some of whom are a lot more plausible than others.

I will off course eat my hat or anything else you want to donate if any of Blacksmiths predictions ever come to pass.
His scatter gun approach,not so much since he dropped a few clangers,is bound to hit the target every now and then though.

I believe there is only one blacksmith,his name is out there if anyone wants to find it.His writings would certainly suggest he has some kind of multiple personality disorder.
Wouldn't completely rule out the possibility that he has a partner who jumps his computer on occasions.Either way i am sure most of us who have been around since the beginning will have interacted with him/them at some point in the past.

Got loads more but will let others have their say.

There was a hilarious poster back on the 3as that did parodies and such. Can't for the life of me remember his name. Maybe this was Blacksmith as you refer to cutting his teeth Lioned. His writings were brilliant, funny satire, worthy of publication. I think he specialised in pictures if anyone can remember him.

I can understand why Blacksmith turned slightly against Amaral. This was around the time that Amaral seemed to be getting taken in by the conspiracy theories, and I had the same thoughts myself of don't go there! I support Amaral's theory 100% and didn't want to see him opening himself up to fantasy and ridicule.

Just to add everything BS has said about the cesspit is spot on!

Whether he has inside info or is just incredibly insightful I'm not sure.

Oh and the McApline stuff. Wasn't he right to defend the Lord because it wasn't him it was his brother! HWSNBN is an attention seeking idiot and I can see him being sued again in the not too distant future if he doesn't shut his trap.

It was actually Mcalpines cousin who allegedly was picking up boys from the North Wales home in his Car outside the gates.'Jimmy' his name is in the public domain and was printed in the msm at the time as well so its no secret.


There were a few satirists on the 3a's.Will think of his name in a minute.The Burger van was a good one.

To find blacksmith you just need look for those who claim insider knowledge and seek attention.

That's right his cousin, thanks Lioned.

Burger Van sounds familiar. It might have been him. Let us know if you remember any of the others.

Bloody useless game yesterday, heard everyone was walking out after 30 minutes in disgust.

Not about Blacksmith - but was `Himself` a member of 3As?

His pics remind me of the MCCANNO pics and wondered if it was the same person.

dawnie_c wrote:That's right his cousin, thanks Lioned.

Burger Van sounds familiar. It might have been him. Let us know if you remember any of the others.

Bloody useless game yesterday, heard everyone was walking out after 30 minutes in disgust.

Lucky i didnt go as had to be elsewhere.

Anyway there was CaboFrio who ran his burger van and a parody of gerrys blog.Another was DoobyScoo ? Or something like that.

I used to buy burgers from Stavros drippy nose burger van on the corner of Cold Blow Lane.

CabrioFabrio that is him!!!!!

Lioned wrote:
I used to buy burgers from Stavros drippy nose burger van on the corner of Cold Blow Lane.

Those were the days ay!

It all sounds so exotic to a foreigner...